beLIEve

You'll never know,
and I can never let you,
I'll hide behind an adulterer's shroud,
and make all the lies seem true,
but even in this skin I am not home,
I'm not being completely true,
sitting at an ungodly throne
just to protect you.

My ultimate act of love
and self preservation,
my divinity shows I am from heaven above,
as well does my deviation.
You fail to see where you're so wrong,
and I cannot correct you,
and you call me a ticking bomb,
I'll leave nothing when I'm through.

I've tried,
and it was definitely hard enough,
plenty of times
but I guess I've got too much blood.
Call me insignificant
if it'll help you,
say you regret all of it,
but are you sure that's true?

Question.
Leave nothing to rest.
Objectives
are more than their surface.
Visibility
just question your
Reality.
None of it's true.

I lied to you.

And it's so fucking hilarious to watch two worlds collapse, once so joined, but torn by paranoia and hatred held in such secrecy. Contempt was the enemy.
You'll never fucking understand-- intelligence without common sense. You optimistic child, you'll never see where you're wrong in being so mild.
I am not a toy to be fixed. Nobody's broken; I'm tired of that shit.
Fuck the severity of the issue, scars cover my body, now; I'm so ecstatic you believed it all, so happy you let it fall, and I've never been so proud.
You understand nothing. One thing
you'll never know-- something textbooks can't show-- you never live if you never die.
Go ahead and regret me. Waste your time, so asinine.
You made the same choices I did, remember that night of fatal sin?
You told me to. Two years later, you did it again. I was never untrue 'til the moment we had our end.
Laughable. All of it. I don't care if you know this;
Truth is, I'm a better liar than I thought I was.
And you believed me.
You believed me.
You believed me.
You believed me.

No more lies.

No more love.
Not for you.
So another cut
and knife held askew
more blood,
that's what I love.
You'd never accept me for who I really am,
I'd still hide it from you, best I can,
Being free from under your thumb,
you were right to call me a bomb.
Tick tick tick
you little prick,
You were always a thorn in my side
and a cause of the migraines,
in you, there was no pride,
just bullshit aspartame,
far too sweet
for reality.
And that last lie I told,
you dropped the facade of gold,
Always starting with apologies,
then taking more shots at me.
Hypocrite.
Full of shit.
After we were said and done
we were dead, and the fun
just started, hilariously true,
the bed's more comfortable without you.

I bit my tongue for you
because I didn't think you deserved it,
I gave her the same testament,
but she's the one it's entitled to.
Pacifism is another one of your flaws,
come to think of it, boss,
you sicken me.
I am not your hound.
You own no one,
you should be ashamed,
Your control is no fun,
It's just deranged.
This is the first time in months I've even thought of you.
How are you doing?
How's life?
Isn't it
fucking
grand?

Two years and one day.
That's when it decayed.
I felt it slip, slide, and slither in my bones,
tearing apart what I thought was my home,
but it showed me the truth;
a relationship based on pity has a true name: abuse.
Four months later I met someone worthy,
but they only scarred me,
I'm left with a map around my body
and I feel Godly.

Bow down at the mere thought of me,
let me ruin your day with one memory,
let my smile bring you to tears,
crack your facade and strengthen your fears.

And I'll only laugh.

Because you believed me.
You believed me.
You believed me.
YOU BELIEVED ME.

And you're so better off without me.

No tricks.
No lies.
No deviancy,
Just honesty.

Be happy.

I'm sorry for dragging you so far down
to dip you in the gasoline until you drowned,
just to lift you back up, and dunk you again,
I hope you'll no longer feel this pain.
I'm sorry,
and honestly,
if there was an easier way,
I would've chosen it,
but I needed to ensure that one day,
you'd forget it.

Enjoy life, Lily of Purity.
Bless Humanity.

For I am merely a Rider.
My time will come to pestile this land,
so I need to get you farther
away from me as I can.

Please, believe me.

I loved you.
But no more.